Hello everyone I have decided to share my story with you all in hopes of finding some support as well as finding people who can relate to what I am going through. Throughout my journey so far on this diet, I have gone through obstacles that I thought would go away forever before starting. I suffer from binge eating disorder and have had this for about 2 years now. It has completely ruled my life. I have lost many friends and my relationship with my loved ones has suffered along the way. What started as eating a whole bag of chips has turned into uncontrollable eating. I stuff my face with whatever I can get my hands on when I am feeling emotions such as sadness, worry, or anger. Now, when I think about it, even when I do not feel these emotions, I tend to binge just because my body is so used to all the sugar and carbs.
This problem for me is primarily due to being thousands of miles away from my fiance due to school and it won't be awhile til we can be together in one place for good. I know eating is not the answer. In fact, it makes the situation worse. I refuse to show my face after a binge episode for days and tend to skip school a lot. I do not feel as healthy as I used to and surely not as happy.
So, I wanted to change which is why I took up this challenge to complete the hCG diet. I thought it would be my answer to "fixing" this problem I have. Ha, was I wrong. Stupid me. The urges to binge were still as strong as ever. Don't get me wrong, the first 10 days I did GREAT and lost 11 pounds. I was so happy. Then all hell broke lose. Last weekend I got upset over a minor issue and binged like no tomorrow for two days straight. I gained ALL 11 pounds back. Can you believe it!? Talk about a disappointment. But, I decided to keep going. So here I am. I am acting ask if this is day 3 instead of day whatever its supposed to be (Day 17?) and I am shooting for day 30 at least. Its more of a mental thing for me to think of this as day 3. I do not want to remember that I lost the battle in the end after 14 days. I really want to succeed. I know the urges will be there because I am still experiencing them but I have to learn again how to eat properly and take my emotions somewhere else rather than to food. I have received such great help from others and was told that a Leptin Reset may actually help me solve those urges during P3. Obviously, my body's chemistry is completely out of wack and it will take time to recover from 2 years worth of bashing it. I really cannot believe what I have allowed myself to become and I know it is time for a change. I am doing this for ME first of all and also for my loved ones, especially my fiance who has been so supportive of me.
I am also looking for some support from you to keep me going. Thank you so much in advance!