makana

Well, it has been about 10 days since I last checked in. Things have been a madhouse around here. I was hired last Friday and started training on Monday! And they all say the economy is bad...ha! So that was a huge transition, made at light speed, for myself and the fam. To go from being home full time (for nearly 9 years) to a full time position, plus the commute for training, wow, what a week.
The stress has been off the charts, I have a test tomorrow that I have to pass to keep the job. Trying to keep the house together-clean, laundry done, groceries bought and food prepared. All the things that I have been doing, just subtract 55 hours...I know, the majority of the population does this all the time, just a big change for me.
The kids have had a really hard time too. So blessed that hubby works nights, so he is home most of the time that I am gone and my Mom is filling in the holes and overlapping time we are both gone. Many tears in the mornings, and not just from the kids. Had more than one day that I questioned what I was doing and if it was the right thing. The guilt was overwhelming!
So, needless to say the losses this week have not been so great. I have stuck with the diet, no cheating...even though I SO wanted to! A coffee/latte on the way to work, the incredible bakery down the street, the snack for the drive home and the exhaustion and total lack of energy to make good food when I got home! Ugh! But, I did it, managed the stress and emotions and stuck to protocol. Was horribly frustrating because this is exactly when I stalled in Round 1, for about 10 days-either a gain or no loss. I had to remember that when stepping on the scale (really early in the morning), not to get royally ticked and hit the donut house on the way to work. So it has been a good week all things considered. I am happy with the loss that I have and am going to finish this round strong. My goal for Round 2 was 20 pounds (having heard to expect really slow losses for R2) and I am at almost 18 pounds lost with three weeks left in the round. I am hoping to repeat the trend that happened in R1, with the losses picking up in the last 1/3 of the round. We will see. Either way, it feels good to be faced with all of this emotion and stress and stay on course and make good decisions.
Just for my notes, here are the things that have been different this past week, know they all play a part:
-less sleep
-tons of sitting!!!!
-body aches/sore (from the sitting!)
Once I start in my actual position, the commute is under 10 minutes door to door, I will be standing with some walking all day, the fam can see me on my lunches, the schedule is very accommodating for our needs and it is just less stress when you take away the fear of the unknown. That all should help increase the losses for this round.
Got to see Auto, my most amazingly skinny bff last weekend! She looks so great even with the cross country drive and MAJOR stress of life right now. Was so nice to visit with the whole fam for a bit. Will be nice to have her closer-well, relatively so. Miss her terribly, but enjoying technology to stay in touch.
Went shopping with my daughter this weekend-had a girl's day out! She was so excited! I had a list of things I needed for work attire and her school shopping. Was so nice to have some time just the two of us, just what we both needed. And, I am firmly in a size 12-no spanx required!!!! So thrilled about this! Started this journey in a very snug Lane Bryant 18/20, which is a normal store's size 22 probably. I can shop almost anywhere and not feel like the employees are trying to send me to the "fat" section. They were helpful and attentive, something that was hard to find at 236 pounds. Sad but true. Something I want to make sure I remember as the feelings fade.
Well, I better head to bed. Need to have some brain power for this huge test tomorrow. Just wanted to check in and get some progress thoughts in writing. Will be better about updating as things smooth out and we all find a routine. Praying for any stalls or gains to be due to the ton of information crammed into my brain! LOL! Good night!