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CrystalMamaof4

So I lost all this weight but I still feel fat..

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CrystalMamaof4
, July 26th, 2012 at 06:00 PM (1508 Views)
If you would have asked me 4 weeks ago how I felt about my new body, I said things like "Amazing, sexy, beautiful" I felt myself flaunting and flirting with my husband again. Those things that I couldn't bear to bring myself to do when I weighed 200lbs. TWO HUNDRED POUNDS. Wow, saying that now it hit me, that's a LOT it's not a few pounds overweight, it is obese for my height.

So I start r2 on Monday, I feel both excited and scared, scared because I hope I can do it again and I loose somewhat of the same amount of weight on r1, though the odds are stacked against me. Excited because it puts me closer to my goal. Excited to see what I will look like and feel like in my body when I loose more. Scared because what if I don't loose well, what if I reshape all funny and loose my breasts but keep my huge *** pregnancy looking belly or it will hang even further south than it does now. That is a real fear right there. I am a apple shape, I have huge breasts and huge waist and small legs, arms and no butt. It's as flat as a board in the butt and hip area!

So back to my original thinking...I lost this weight and still feel fat, why? Well, because I am still fat LOL! I didn't realize it until yesterday. I was getting life insurance quotes and when he said I can't get the preferred elite rate because I am overweight. I was about ready to say to him "Look here, I am NOT anymore. I was but I lost 35lbs how dare you still say I am too fat?" then I really would have been the crazy lady! As he was explaining everything to me all I could focus on was him saying i was over weight.

I guess I lost track of that somewhere, I guess I thought I was normal now, not over weight still. So I went on a BMI calculator and ran the numbers, sure enough I am overweight which I KNEW this because the day I came from obese to overweight on the BMI I was so happy..yet it just didn't sink in. Not only am I overweight, but I am still on the HIGH end of overweight. So if you are feeling fat after loosing all your weight, look at your weight and height and see are you still fat? Just less fat? Cause I am standing right next to you if you are!

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  1. cynm's Avatar
    I just started my second round i lost 24 lbs the first one ..i started at 192 got down to 168 but regained to 182...so frustrated with my self and i def still feel fat but i have to tell myself i am less than i was and i will lose it again....Good luck to u!
  2. Sessy's Avatar
    It's odd I know. You lose all that weight and feel absolutely great and then somewhere during P3 you feel "heavy" again. I felt the same, then I realized that I had lost 30 lbs and 29 1/2 inches! My clothes are too big, so I know I did lose. It's a mind thing and you have to let go of it and think of how awesome you did and how far you've come already. You are on your way to a healthier lifestyle and looking great while getting there. It will pass, just be proud of how far you've already come and look forward to the losses you'll have again in your next round. Negative thoughts are poison, so be good to yourself and be proud of what you've done so far and things will be great! Congrats!
  3. redefiningme's Avatar
    Okay, let's begin by making one thing certain: You are a losing winner!!!!

    Second: DO not give the insurance guy business ;he was certifiably rude.

    Third: Embrace your new you! Post your weight loss results and inches lost in a visible place.

    Fourth: Buy a couple pieces of new clothes in your new size!!

    and, of course, keep trekking!
  4. CrystalMamaof4's Avatar
    Thanks guys

    I really appreciate the support and comments! I am proud of where I came from and all the weight I lost. I am also very excited to see where I end this journey when I complete it. It's REALLY exciting knowing I found a way to get rid of the weight AND keep it off, that is the most AMAZING feeling after years and years of being overweight.

    I just found it weird that within a month I went from feeling elated and thin then the next fat and mushy again!

    As far as the insurance guy, he wasn't rude, he was honest and it's what I needed. I needed that reality check, I felt "fatter" since p3 but couldn't figure out why I was beginning to feel this way. The insurance guy just pointed out the "why" I feel this way. He was really nice about it, I think honestly I backed him into the corner because he said my husband was getting the preferred elite rate then asked the big "Why him and not me?" He was; for lack of better words forced to say it .
  5. Newjulie's Avatar
    Please celebrate how far you have come! You are doing terrific and you will need every ounce of gratitiude and perseverence and positive reinforcement to hit new numbers and stay there. when you catch yourself having a negative thought --- replace it with a positive one. Your job is to be the best that YOU can be and not to worry about anything else.

    Good luck and have fun with this! Getting to buy new clothes is definitely an incentive - doncha think? Maybe some nice slim jeans that you can tuck into a new pair of boots this winter!?!?! I always feel elated when I realize I can buy regular boots and not wide calf --- LOL!