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Hellobikini Getting to her Bikini

Sensitive to People telling me I don't need to lose weight

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Okay I should just take it as a compliment but I can't. I keep getting comments like, "you don't need to lose weight" or "don't lose too much", or "you are fine the way you are, why don't you accept yourself"
It really friggen bugs me. For one thing it is my body, my choice. For another thing I totally disagree. I am 5'5" and normal range for me is between 111-145. I want to be at the lower end of normal range. I am trying to be super model skinny. I want to be comfortable in my clothes, and not feel awful in a swimsuit. So why are all these people telling me to stop. I could understand if their was risk of anorexia or somthing, but I am not even close. I am quite voluptuous at 140 and really disliking my heavy thighs, thick arms and belly. Isn't okay to want to look good and lose weight????
I don't know if people are threatened, envious, concerned or just actually want to say something and saying, "good for you, about time you lost weight" would be sort of an insult, so its better to say I don't need to lose weight than encouraging me on.
I suppose it is just a sensitive subject. I guess I would tend to tell someone not to lose than to lose. I told my friend, who is on it with me and wants to quit. She should stay on it at least stick the 23 days and didn't she want to lose it a little more? She was insulted and said, she was happy with her weight. I quickly nodded agreement, said she looked great, but she should stick to protocol to make sure she keeps it off and wouldn't it be nice to end up lower than goal weight so you have some leway. She has decided to stick out the 23 days but I think she is still offeneded that I am encouraging her to lose more. It is not that I think she "should" and If she is happy at the weight great, but protocol and leway seem like great reasons to continue.
Well okay, I realize I am not being honest. I do think she would look better if she lost more. She is my height and weight and it is my personal preference, but I think if she is happy there it is totally her decision but I really think she needs to finish protocol to not have problems keeping it off. I also have read many senior members saying they stick better with a longer vlcd time. So I want to go as long as I can go. I still never made it to 40 days.

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  1. hellobikini's Avatar
    I am trying to edit my own blog entry and can't!!! I am sooo uncomputer savvvy.
    So I was trying to say maybe I am too sensitive and when I put myself in other people's shoes I do the same thing and have my opinions etc. that when spoken may offend and that was not my intention.
    Also I wrote I am trying to be model skinny. It was suppposed to be I NOT trying to be...
  2. curvygirl63's Avatar
    Change is not easy and to those people who tell you "not to lose too much weight" - keep in mind that not only are you changing but what is changing is the way they used to see you - on the outside. Some people will lose weight an look nothing like they used to at the heavier weight. Some people might be afraid that when you change the ouside, that you somehow change as the person they "knew" on the inside. You are the same person but how they feel about your physical changes, is really hard for them to accept.

    Concerning your friend, you can talk until you are blue in the face but if she has decided to not do the full 23 days, she will not do it. She may be happy where she's at or she might be dealing with some mental/emotional issues that have come up. And if she doesn't do the 23 days to "keep off" what's she's lost already, so what. You will NEVER be able to talk her into anything she doesn't want to do. And if she gains it back, she can always do another round to get it back off.

    I am 5'5" also and have a long way to go but I've decided that I was going to not focus on a number on the scale but let my body decide the weight I should be. Your body may not want to go down to the lower end of your weight range but that doesn't mean you shouldn't try. As long as HCG is working... keep going until your body doesn't have any more abnormal fat to release.

    Good luck to you and your friend.
    Updated October 18th, 2011 at 03:05 PM by curvygirl63
  3. captncrunch's Avatar
    I've been feeling the same way, it's not a sensitive topic for me as of yet, because the people telling me not to get to thin has misty been my family. I'm ~ 5"2 and my original goal was 115, whic would put me at around the low mid range for my height. I wanna be slim and trim, so I can be comfortably in my clothes, and well because I can. I'm young and too look good in a mini skirt you kinda need to be thin and damnit I want a closet full of mini skirts. I know though that my family I think when they say, don't get to thin, it's because. They really want me to not go overboard (which I think can be easy to do when w/ hcg most of us have finally found a method that makes virtually any goal possible), and they're ready for me to be happy and again and live my life and be able to enjoy foods again. But I have a picture in my head that they can't see, and I know that I'll be happy when I get to that point. So I simply say, I understand but I wanna go all the way.

    Comming from outside the family though, I can understand how it can become irritating because like curveygirl said people can be intimidated by change and sometimes it's hard to tell where someone else's motivations lie when they're trying to dissuade you from doing something the seems so obviously for the better. But ultimately it is your body. I always tell my myself that im not doing this for anyone else, because no one else is feeling uncomfortable when my jeans are too tight. Do it for you, until you are happy.
  4. emross82's Avatar
    I feel the same way, for me it was in p3 when I finished my first round pepole are like "dont get too skinny or your too skinny . Um im 5'8 and 135...not "too" skinny. Yes im back on p2, hopefully I dont hear it again. P2 can be a bit hard for others to understand..especailly when you dont tell them your on hcg and theyre wondering why your only eating chicken, fage and protien shakes...with mustard as your main "salad" aka lettuce dressing. But p3 feels pretty normal to me. And its healthier then most people eat. I get more protien with my greek yogurt then they do with their cereal or whatever "normal" people eat for breakfast. my goal is 125-127...and I think I may just hit it this round. I have exactly 2 weeks til ill be in p3, and even though im not hungry at bored and I want to feel normal again and cant wait to at least eat a semi normal dinner with my husband again. Good luck to you all, keep motivated. No one can make you eat something you dont want to, and people can say all they want but it is your decision on what you want to weight/size you are. I feel like I want ot lose this not because I felt fat at 135-137..but because like hellobikini said, I want that leway, so even when i super treat myself, I can do a high protien or FFF day and bring it back to good. There are certain numbers I dont want to see again til baby makin time.
  5. hellobikini's Avatar
    b Thanks for the support.
    I know I am going to have to adjust my attitude because it really irks me and I am in the first week of p2 and already getting the comments. I plan on dropping another 15ish if all goes well, so people are going to have lots of comments.

    I too want more to find a place I feel good at rather than focusing on a number. I also think my body may not let me stay at the weight I want to get to. The first round I stabalized very well at 152. In the Second round my lowest weight was 137 and as soon as I finished p3 I quickly went up to 145 and stayed around there. That was the weight I spent a lot of time at pre-pregnancy. I would diet to 130 and then sure enough eventually be back at 145. I spent the 10yrs pre pregnancy fluctuating between 130-145lbs. I spent the last 6yrs post babies, fluctuating between 150-165. When I got up to 170 I went on HCG. I think most the people in my life now have only seen me at the higher weight, and it is hard for them to adjust to my wieght loss. It is funny because I think that is part of the reason I feel irked. I wasn't always that heavy. I see myself at the pre-pregnancy weight and they see me at the post pregnancy weight bcs that is all they have ever seen. It seems to bother me they see me as a heavy person and that they think I should be okay with that because that is who I am to them.
    Maybe I should carry around a photo of me at me when I met my husband and when people say I am getting to thin, whip it out and say I just want to get to the weight I used to be at most my life. and shove it in their face. LOL.
    But seriously, the comments are going to keep coming. I have to stop feeling insulted by them, and take them as a compliment or encouragement in some way.
    I need all the encouragement I can get!!!
  6. emc_nyc's Avatar
    Wow. I have begun experiencing this myself. I don't want to even be "model skinny," but I would like to be what's considered ideal weight for my height. I am ten pounds over that right now and people have begun to say I'm too skinny. One woman at church (not even pretending to look concerned) scolded me for getting to thin. When I told her what I weighed she looked non-plussed and didn't know what to say. I was offended that I had to defend myself and losing 60 pounds of ugly fat. Maybe people are getting accustomed to seeing a generally overweight society and are now baised in their mind against someone who is (ten pounds above) normal weight? I am five-three and was 135 when she said this to me. I want to get to 125, which is not even the low range of normal for my height. It feels really weird. And people who say they are 70 pounds or more overweight tell me they "just don't know" about this diet I'm on. Come on, people -- I want to say -- is being that much overweight healthy? I was 50-60 lbs overweight for nearly 10 years. Is that better than losing the weight, eating healthy and feeling great? It is such a weird experience. I really believe fat is becoming the new norm and that if you are that overweight then it should just be accepted. Right along with the diabetes, joint troubles, heart troubles, et cetera, that go along with those comfy, squishy, lovely, fatty pounds.
  7. hellobikini's Avatar
    I think you are right. It is uncomfortable for people to see us shrinking. It was more "normal" to see us overweight.
    I still get it and I have pretty much been the same weight for the last 5 months. One woman told me the other day you sure are getting skinny. I started to say i am not losing weight, I am maintaining....bla bla, and she said, don't get upset it was a compliment. I started laughing. I am so used to being criticized for my weight loss I couldn't reconize a compliment. I said, "well thank you then." I still want to drop another 10lb but I don't dare tell people.
    I have moved on the leptin reset/p3 and I am slowly dropping. I hope to stay on this route slow and steady until I get to my desired weight. Though it seems if I want to maintain I will have to do it for life. I have learned anytime I add starches and sugars I immediately gain. This is a bit depressing. But the more I read about starches and sugars it is just plain good to keep them out of my life forefver.