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HCG and me post2

blogging for later thanks werem0620 for the post

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#13 werem0620
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Join Date:May 2012
Posts:23Hi Duchess - i totally understand where you are coming from. I have yoyo'd since i was the age of 11 and got my period. I have struggled with eating over and over again and ALWAYS felt like I got the short end of the stick, since I would see others eat unhealthy things in front of me, and seem to sit at the same weight. I always thought it was unfair, that I was doing everything in my power to stay skinny. I am known for doing cleanses and crazy diets all the time. Everyone who knows me asks, what crazy diet or cleanse is she doing this month. I did my first round of hcg back in June and am going through my second round now. This is one thing, that i can say i learned from this diet, and this really sucks, but I have to suck it up, and deal with it. REPEAT AFTER ME: I am never going to be one of those people that is going to be able to eat what I want and not gain weight from it. I will have to spend my life being conscious of what i put in my body, in order to be healthy, have energy and feel good about myself. No amount of pizza, bread, big macs, mac & cheese will every make me feel better about myself, in fact, it just makes me feel awful after I eat it (not only mentally, but physically too). I am clearly not the first person to say this, but in all honesty, we are so tied up with associating food/drinks with feelings and fun, that it puts us on a spiraling path downwards. When I go on P2, I still join friends for dinner and have tea or water. At first, this was so uncomfortable and weird, but then I came to the realization: "Am i here to enjoy my friends/family and see them, see what they have been up to, enjoy conversation, or am I here to scarf down this meal and leave. Because if that's it, then why not just order something to my house and eat it alone in misery.

Its hard, im not going to lie, but I have really come to the acceptance that I need to be diligent about what I put in my mouth. I have to struggle everyday to teach myself that food is not a reward or there to make me feel better after a bad day. Its sustenance, and I need it to keep me healthy and feeling good, so I can focus on the real fun stuff.

Sorry for the ramble. Im not sure if this will even help you, but I totally relate to where you are coming from. I too hope this is the last major struggle I have to put up with with food, and I can find peace in that. I may fall off this wagon, but I sure as well will keep trying. Nothing beats feeling good and healthy about yourself.

Good Luck! I am sure you are on the road to greatness. Keep your head up, and remember its a journey!

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