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Health and Happiness: My Journey

Ending My Last Round: A New Beginning!

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Hello All!

Well, although I'm not at my original goal of 115, I decided that my morning dose of HCG was going to be my last, and that I will stabilize at 116.4 pounds!

I did a little bit of an exercise in self confidence yesterday. I've noticed that with HCG, the rapid loss of weight sometimes makes it hard for us to really see the changes in our bodies. With my last day approaching, I decided to really give my body a good hard look.

I went through old photos and looked at myself at my heaviest, and the steps along the way. Then, I sucked it up and put on my littlest undies and stood in front of the mirror. This is something I almost never do, because normally, the more I look at my body, the more I see wrong with it. This time, however, I decided to be kinder to myself.

I looked at myself and noted the progress I have made. I'm leaner. I'm more proportional. I'm less "lumpy."

Then I looked at what still bothered me, and decided to accept it. I have thighs. I always have. Its not likely that my legs will ever be "straight" from thigh to ankle. I have a tush. But its smaller than it's been in years, and hey, I look pretty good!

I thought about what I have control over. My body will always be shaped the way that it is shaped, but I do have control over how toned my muscles are. I can be lean and strong. I don't just want to be thin...I want to be fit. That is something that is in my power. I can achieve my fitness goals.

I tried on some old clothes. Surprisingly, things I wore only last summer (16 pounds ago) were too big to wear. My "tight" jeans fit like a glove. I get to go shopping for spring clothes. That's something to celebrate!

I decided to be proud of myself. I've come so far, and learned so much. I've been so strong. The least I can do is stop bullying myself, and be a friend.

I went to bed last night more at peace with my body than I can remember feeling since I was a very small child.

As I move into this next phase, not only will I build a healthy balanced relationship with food, but I will also continue to work on my relationship with myself.
This is the beginning of a beautiful, lifelong, friendship.

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Comments

  1. Blak Porsche's Avatar
    Very real and profound! Best wishes to you!
  2. tomwilla's Avatar
    Beautifully said. You should be proud at your ACCOMPLISHMENT I think you have done great!!!
  3. Annie226's Avatar
    Dear skinny, how inspiring!!! I am unsure your age, but Maya Angelou said "once women turn 50 y/o she is finally the woman she has always wanted to be!!!". I am assuming you are much younger, much wiser than I....great luck! I so appreciate your wisdom!!!
  4. LilShelliBelli's Avatar
    I read your posts, and I just want to say, "yeah, what she said!". You speak so eloquently and fluently, putting into words all the same thoughts I have had recently as I prepare to go into P3. You've done AMAZING! You have much to be proud of SM. Not just your weight loss and your journey, not just your goals, but the positive life you seek to live and achieve going past the HCG protocol! Bravo for expressing these joys and allowing others such as us to share in your triumphs! Thank you and continued best wishes to you!
  5. Third time is a charm's Avatar
    Well said Skinny Mari, a true inspiration.
  6. yep yep I can's Avatar
    Beautiful.. I am so happy for you not just in the weight loss, but in discovering you! Hope the rest of your journey is a GREAT one.