Yes, again. But I am going to focus on the positive today and say, I made it through day 1.
So, I have had an easy day-spent most of it sleeping. Worn out from life and the past few weeks, then was out too late last night. So I rested and slept a ton. Had some hunger most of the day, but I don't think much of that was true caloric need in my body. I think most of it was mental and habit, and I know this will fade as the days go on. I am thinking about everything, making a choice every
This has been the toughest week of this whole 4 month journey. The guilt, stress, emotions and exhaustion have taken over my life...no, I am not a victim-I have given up control again. I have made the job, house, kids and everything else the priority and moved myself to the bottom of the list again. I have cheated everyday this week, which, as we all know, has increased the downward spiral.
Trying to find a balance in my life has been a huge challenge. The marriage issues have added so
Today just needs to end so I can start fresh tomorrow. After 4 months of following the entire protocol exactly, I finally broke and cheated tonight. Don't know what sent me over the edge or made the right choice so hard to find. I know that I made the decision and put the food in my mouth. I am not blaming anyone or anything else. I take full responsibility. But WTH?!!!?!?!?!
What is going on that is so different? Why now when I have been so strong for so long? I know that I only
Well, I have made it to the weekend. Managed to make it through a second week of full time work. Only had to make the long drive for three days, then two in my regular position. I love it! Was so totally, completely freaked out yesterday, but then, of course, it was worse in my head than in reality. The people are amazingly wonderful and I like what i am doing.
Missing my family and feeling the squeeze at home, but holding things together. Trying to stay super organized and look ahead
Well, it has been about 10 days since I last checked in. Things have been a madhouse around here. I was hired last Friday and started training on Monday! And they all say the economy is bad...ha!So that was a huge transition, made at light speed, for myself and the fam. To go from being home full time (for nearly 9 years) to a full time position, plus the commute for training, wow, what a week.
The stress has been off the charts, I have a test tomorrow that I have to pass to keep
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